WRITING RULES DEFINITELY MAYBE

I haven't written anything in a while, apart from some long-winded passages in my small journal. I've been doing exercises to try to come up with something: I'll sit in one place, facing one direction, and describe the scenery. I'll write automatically. I'll take a marker and cross out all the writing on a newspaper, leaving only the occasional word, in hopes to come up with something poetic, if not profound.* I take everything apart and deconstruct, but nothing comes. I kick the watering hole in my mind for being not unlike a desert.

Why is it that way? What is missing? I am challenging myself to put pen to paper, to think abstractly and outside-the-box. I am still trying to remain open to new things, still going downtown with no plans to find something or nothing. I am still looking at everything. Where did it go? Perhaps something needs to stir. Maybe I've been playing it too safe.

* On yesterday's front page of the entertainment section of the Toronto Star, I came up with Just the most beautiful way into the epic landscapes. Await peaks, themselves. Different subject provides steps through brilliant experience ideal. I thought it had it's moments.


I've been thinking about writing a set of rules for myself, a series of dreams and aspirations to which I will (try to) live by. I think you can get to know a lot about somebody from the guidelines they've cut out for themselves, or at least you can get to know what they want to shy away from. Can you imagine if we all had our own book, consisting of all our habits, fears, on-going resolutions, and hopes? I think that would be interesting. I once wrote a song called The Book of Me, maybe I'll bring it out of retirement. Anyway, my new rules will be both concrete and abstract, ranging from little things that can be easily applied to any day (eat lots not too much mostly plants) to more obscure, if-and-when moments (stop staring/do you like her laugh?). Once the rules are done, they'll have to be edited and aligned for the sake of coherence. Maybe then they can be turned into something that at least resembles art... a poster, an illustrated magazine, some songs?

I've been working on words for about a month and a half now for a piece that Jeff came up with during rehearsal. I thought up a subject matter that I thought suited the off-kilter musical arrangement we were playing. It's loosely based off a few encounters I had with some very nice people this summer, who seemed to be very genuine and friendly but unfortunately lacked the ability to say no when they really wished to. When people feel forced to positively respond to a situation when they feel the opposite, it can lead to a series of confusing misunderstandings and countries of embarrassment. It did for me. It's tentatively titled Definitely Maybe Positively Sometime, and it's gonna have moments of spoken-word. Yesterday at Value Village with Adam, I stumbled upon a volume of hardcovers that I thought might be inspirational to browse for the sake of the lyrics to this song. I didn't end up picking them up (volume five was absent) but maybe I'll go back. I still need a Halloween costume, after-all.